In a striking turn of events, I feel like a bag of bones today. A very nauseous, very tired, ever so slightly irritable bag of bones.
My umpteenth Remicade infusion was Saturday, and I left the hospital feeling ill, which typically does not happen. Full disclosure; I did enter the infusion clinic preemptively concerned about having developed Remicadibodies and having an allergic reaction. This manifestation stemmed from my sort-of-recent hyper-allergenic condition (read: psoriasis, dermatitis, new mouse allergies, hives). While there was no immediate reaction to be seen -- bummer -- I did not feel well for hours afterward. In fact, I did not feel well for any part of Sunday either. And, in case reiteration is necessary, I do not feel well today.
It is highly unlikely that this is more attributable to Remicade than to the gluttonous amounts of [cooked] leafy greens I've been eating of late. I would even stretch to suggest it might be a result of the increased carb-heavy (read: salty, sugary, processed) foods whose ingestion I have defended on the basis of not being able to chew anything with much of a texture (potentially making the leafy greens an even more obvious culprit). Thanks to Remicade, I'm not in very much pain, but those manifold side effects are aggregating.
And yet, this bag of bones was here at work promptly at 7am processing tissue samples and simultaneously probing nitrocellulose membranes. This means I have what it takes to survive six years of this work load ten fold in graduate school, yes?..
Hopefully you are feeling better now. And hopefully the next injection will go better. I always (ok, usually) try to be very, very careful about triggers I can control before doing things I know might make me sick.
ReplyDeleteI also wanted to respond to this particular part of your post - And yet, this bag of bones was here at work promptly at 7am processing tissue samples and simultaneously probing nitrocellulose membranes. This means I have what it takes to survive six years of this work load ten fold in graduate school, yes?..
One of the most frustrating things about my migraines is that pushing through feeling bad - like you did this morning - is likely to make me feel much, much worse for the next several days. But not always. Which really makes me feel like I don't have what it takes to "survive six years of this work load ten fold in graduate school." Sometimes it's hard to figure out when I should push. I have a lot of guilt/worry around the times I don't push, even when I know it's best for me and my work in the long run.
sarcozona -- it sounds like you're more diligent in avoiding triggers than i am. and especially if you know what yours are (?), you have your most valuable survival tool. that, and developing juggling tricks with time management to yield recovery room.
ReplyDeleteworking through my bad days doesn't typically make me feel worse later as it does you, which is to my benefit. i just feel like shit when i'm doing it. i'm banking on juggling tricks and not having time to eat :) and i'm sure we'll both find new tools along the way.